Posted by: emjb | December 29, 2005

Happier things

Nathan is changing so much, already; his eyes follow me intently, and he smiles a gummy smile when he sees certain things; the lights and shadows on the wall, the stuffed animals hanging above his changing table. His hands clasp each other like Mr. Burns’s and his arms are surprisingly strong as they flail about. He loves his little floor mat/baby gym thingy, and will kick and stare up at it for as much as 2o minutes. He can hold his head up more.

He has a new sound, a sort of half-cry, half-talking noise that he uses to get your attention; imagine just opening your mouth and going “Ahhh, uhh, eehhh, aaah” without moving your lips or tongue. Sometimes he almost laughs.

He’s a quiet baby, actually; he fusses, but hardly ever lets out a real cry–and even then he doesn’t really holler, just one cry, a pause, then maybe another.

He’s such a pretty baby; he has eyes like a character in a Chuck Jones cartoon–like Cindy Lou Who in the Grinch–huge, slightly almond-shaped, long lashes. He flirts at you with them when he wants you to pick him up.

My favorite thing is to hold him up in front of the mirror over our dresser, and see the two of us in the reflection; it’s kind of shocking and wonderful, to see myself with him, obviously his mama; he really does belong to me. How strange. I really am allowed to keep him, to teach him however I want, to take pride in him. To shape his personality, at least a little. What a huge thing that is. I can’t really get my mind around it.



  1. I do the mirror thing too.
    Definitely Cindy Lou Who.
    So jealous of the 20 minutes. I think you can see personalities pretty early on; seems like you’ve got one of the good ones.

  2. Well, I don’t know if it will last…and it’s not every day! but I’ll enjoy it while I can…

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